After Two Months | My Updated

Assalamualaikum and hye everyone ;')
.
It's been like 2 months already since my last write up which was on 09/10/2017. I wrote about "Pembawa Talasemia", with many undescribeable feelings. Everything mix in a bowl.
.
But, you know what?  Actually, am not a "pembawa talasemia" pun XD
.
The doctor said, something goes wrong with my hemoglobin. Just hemoglobin. And she advised me to eat meat and vegetable a lot! Meat, I will consider. But not for vegetable. Everyone know am not a vegetarian!
.
So, it end there. No more "sad feeling" etc etc. Malu pulak rasa --"
.
Actually, last Monday, Ive been to hospital for my check up. But the doctor did not do any "check up" on me because the specialist was not there. And he asked me to go again for medical check up next May. Oh, what else I can say except of "yeay"! I just love hospital. It taught me a lot!
.
Oh, my spine didnt straight at all. It still bengkok but not that worst like before. Angle tu just 8° something. It increases because last check up, it was just 5°. But it's ok. Still not entering the "worst phase" which I avoid a lot!
.
Btw, to those who were asking about me, thanks for being so concern towards my health. Am OK, and just OK👌 It's been a year after the operation on my spine which was on 20/11/2017. Yes, a year. And yes, to be honest, am not fully recovered yet.
.
I still can feel the pain. Might say, everyday. I always feel like wanna cry whenever the pain comes. But, tahan je. Only God knows how I feel. Only He knows the times I shed my tears from my friends and family members, just to convince them that am OK. I still get the palpitation which I feel like gonna die when it attacks me. I still cant run like before. I still didnt get my "sleep tight". I still didnt get my "happy morning" since I always feel sakit belakang when woke up from sleep. I still cant sit or stand in a long time. I still cant sit on the floor like normal person. And, yes. I cant tunduk like other human being. But dont worry, things are getting better day by day. Just better.
.
It seems like I've faced so many things! And no one knows about it. I just dont like to share it to others, but since many of you were asking, so this is my answer.
.
My smile mean nothing. I still cant get my normal life. I still cant do this and that. My mom warn me to not do this and that, and sort of things that I really wanna do, but I just cant.
.
Life's been so hard for a year. And I just cant believe that I could live my life and went through all of these despite so many things happened. Bad things. And good things too, of course.
.
Am not totally recovered, but am on my way to get my health back. Do pray for me 😊
.
I think, that's all for this time. Till I write again.
.
Much love,
Sha Mohd 😘

.
.

Thanks for reading this entry ^_^